by admin | Dec 27, 2024 | AA
Mr. William G. Wilson
Alcoholics Anonymous
Box 459 Grand Central Station
New York 17, N.Y.
Dear Mr. Wilson,
Your letter has been very welcome indeed.
I had no news from Roland H. anymore and often wondered what has been his fate. Our conversation which he had adequately reported to you had an aspect of which he did not know. The reason, that I could not tell him everything, was that those days I had to be exceedingly careful of what I said. I had found out that I was misunderstood in every possible way. Thus I was very careful when I talked to Roland H. But what I really thought about, was the result of many experiences with men of his kind.
His craving for alcohol was the equivalent on a low level of the spiritual thirst of our being for wholeness, expressed in medieval language: the union with God.
How could one formulate such an insight in a language that is not misunderstood in our days?
The only right and legitimate way to such an experience is, that it happens to you in reality and it can only happen to you when you walk on a path, which leads you to a higher understanding. You might be led to that goal by an act of grace or through a personal and honest contact with friends, or through a higher education of the mind beyond the confines of mere rationalism. I see from your letter that Roland H. has chosen the second way, which was, under the circumstances, obviously the best one.
I am strongly convinced that the evil principle prevailing in this world, leads the unrecognized spiritual need into perdition, if it is not counteracted either by a real religious insight or by the protective wall of human community. An ordinary man, not protected by an action from above and isolated in society cannot resist the power of evil, which is called very aptly the Devil. But the use of such words arouse so many mistakes that one can only keep aloof from them as much as possible.
These are the reasons why I could not give a full and sufficient explanation to Roland H. but I am risking it with you because I conclude from your very decent and honest letter, that you have acquired a point of view above the misleading platitudes, one usually hears about alcoholism.
You see, Alcohol in Latin is “spiritus” and you use the same word for the highest religious experience as well as for the most depraving poison. The helpful formula therefore is: spiritus contra spiritum.
Thanking you again for your kind letter.
I remain yours sincerely,
C.G. Jung
by admin | Sep 12, 2024 | AA, Addiction
My most dire issue is me, and I am an alcoholic. I have a sobriety date of January 2, 2022, and a Sponsor who knows she is my Sponsor. She has a Sponsor too. My Sponsor has taken me through the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. These days, I have the opportunity, and immense honor, to Sponsor other women as well.
As for the spiritual awakening that comes from these 12 steps, I will honestly “tell on myself” and say that I ask my higher power, whom I have decided to call God, all on my own—no one has ever told me to say that—”When is it going to happen?” It has. I also ask for my spiritual experience. That has happened daily since I picked up that first white chip.
I think I will begin by saying that my alcoholic career began at a very young age. I would swear it is possible for a switch to go off once alcohol touches your lips that first time. I am unsure of that, but I can say that by the age of 8, I was off to the races, sneaking sangria every night before bedtime because it helped me sleep! Plus, I loved how sweet it was. I didn’t taste the alcohol. That was the last thing on my mind. Well, of course at 8 I may not be very picky as to whether or not something would get me tispy, but the feelings of strange, and unable to understand things, and something just not tasting good were normal. Well, alcohol did not fit the bill hidden behind the fruity sangria I would have on a nightly basis. Of course, I was extremely smart and would just add water to the bottle. Of course (smiling), my mother never noticed, nor did she taste it either. Of course, right? Those are the lies I told myself all the way to the age of 37, when I completely decided that alcohol would never come near me again.
I did this on my own. I didn’t see the possibility of a program like AA or that I needed it. Now I look back and realize how miserable I was all of these years and the years before 37. What exactly was I thinking? I am not sure. Looking back, I can see how much alcohol controlled my life and hindered my ability to live fully. Finally, seeking help through Alcoholics Anonymous has been life-changing. I am grateful for the support of my Sponsor and the opportunity to help other women on their journeys to sobriety. I hope that by sharing my experiences, I can inspire others to seek the help they need and begin their own path to recovery.
The road is long but sweet if you allow it to be.
by admin | May 22, 2024 | AA, Addiction, Co-dependency, Lifestyle & Work, Wellness
I have taken on this new perspective, a Twelfth Step practice, of applying the steps to my life. In particular, I am aligning this with love. My experience has shown me I can use this powerlessness ideal for anything.
As a recovering co-dependent, I can say I have been powerless over people. Now, I am admitting that I am powerless over this feeling. Is the feeling good? Yes. Can it become toxic? Yes, it can. Do I want it to be healthy? Yes, I do. So, having “seemingly recovered from a hopeless state of mind and being,” I am officially applying this First step to my emotion – love.
The steps will always work in the same way. I will always feel too much about something. You see, when I don’t overwhelm myself, even if for a moment, with a feeling, then it does not matter. That, of course, does not mean I need to stay there. It seems somewhat dualistic. I know. Is it either love or indifference? Well, maybe. Do we ever act on things and not care while caring? We cannot be doing two things at once. It is not physically possible. Are we always incapable of controlling our emotions and how we behave that it is hopeless? No. Is it possible, though? Yes. Consider something as relevant to me as going to a meeting. I can become so attached to meetings as my saving grace that I refuse to work the program, including living on life’s terms.
My point here is that I have this excellent feeling, and I must first ensure it thrives. I want it to last. This means understanding that the moment I believe I can control it, I have already lost control. I will naturally start to “control it” by worrying. Are the worries necessary? No. Do I worry, regardless? Yes. Do I try to make decisions for “the feeling,” which includes me and possibly someone else? I do. Is this now me trying to control the feeling as well as taking control of someone else’s actions – trying to? Yes. This is why I officially take the first step and admit my powerlessness over this love.
I am not going into this any further. There is too much to be said and insufficient clarity available to share. I can tell, though, that admitting that I feel something, admitting that I have no control over it, admitting that it helps me smile, and admitting that I will allow this to take its course is the best I can do right now.
I admitted that I am powerless over this adoration. I feel that my life has become unmanageable.”
PS. I am NOT interested in managing it. It is so much more beautiful when it happens organically. Do I want it to have happened already? Of course! But that’s when I move on to Step 2.
by admin | May 13, 2024 | AA
Take a look at what you’re doing. Seriously. Do not be afraid. It is scary, time-consuming, and may get you off track. Write down your next steps if you have to, but do not get in your own way.
Why do I say this? From experience, something that has, I hope, made me stronger, and what I hope will not repeat itself with due diligence and practice. Daily practice.
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