The Real Talk About Motivation: How to Actually Create It (And Why It’s Not What You Think)
Let’s be honest for a second. How many times have you scrolled through social media, seen those perfectly curated “rise and grind” posts, and thought, “Why can’t I just be motivated like that?”
I get it. We’ve all been there, staring at our to-do lists, waiting for that magical burst of motivation to hit us like lightning. Spoiler alert: it rarely works that way.
Here’s the thing about motivation that nobody talks about
Motivation isn’t something that just happens to you. It’s not a personality trait you’re either born with or without. It’s actually something you can create, cultivate, and control. But first, you need to understand what motivation really is.
Think of motivation like a fire. You wouldn’t just sit in front of an empty fireplace waiting for flames to appear, right? You’d gather kindling, strike a match, and tend to it. Motivation works the same way.
So how do you actually create motivation?
Start ridiculously small. I’m talking embarrassingly small. Want to exercise? Start by putting on your workout clothes. Want to write? Open a document and write one sentence. The goal isn’t to complete the task perfectly – it’s to create momentum. Success breeds success, and even tiny wins count.
Connect to your why, but make it personal. Not the generic “I want to be successful” why. The real one. The one that makes you a little uncomfortable when you think about it. Maybe it’s proving something to yourself, or creating a different life for your kids, or simply refusing to settle for mediocrity. That discomfort? That’s where real motivation lives.
Create friction for the things you don’t want to do, and remove it for the things you do. Want to eat healthier? Don’t rely on willpower – remove the junk food from your house. Want to read more? Put the book on your pillow so you see it before bed. Design your environment to work with you, not against you.
Track your progress visually. There’s something powerful about seeing your progress mapped out. Whether it’s crossing days off a calendar, filling in a habit tracker, or just writing down three things you accomplished each day – make your progress visible.
Find your motivation style. Some people are motivated by competition, others by collaboration. Some need external accountability, others thrive on internal challenges. Some are motivated by avoiding pain, others by pursuing pleasure. There’s no right or wrong way – just your way.
The motivation myth that’s holding you back
Here’s what most people get wrong: they think motivation should feel good all the time. They think it’s supposed to be this constant state of excitement and energy. But real motivation often feels more like determination than excitement. It’s the quiet voice that says “I’m doing this anyway” when everything else is screaming to quit.
The most motivated people I know aren’t the ones bouncing off the walls with enthusiasm. They’re the ones who show up consistently, especially when they don’t feel like it.
Your motivation toolkit
Start with these three things this week:
- Pick one tiny habit and commit to it for seven days. Make it so small you can’t fail.
- Write down your real why – the one that makes you a little uncomfortable. Keep it somewhere you’ll see it daily.
- Design one small environmental change that makes a good habit easier or a bad habit harder.
But here’s what I really want you to know…
While motivation is incredibly important and absolutely something you can create, it’s not the endgame. It’s not your life’s purpose or your reason for being.
There’s something deeper, more sustainable, and more fulfilling than motivation alone. The Japanese have a word for it: Ikigai. And understanding the difference between motivation and your Ikigai might just change everything about how you approach your goals and your life.
Stay tuned – next week, I’m diving deep into why motivation isn’t your Ikigai, and what that means for creating a life that doesn’t just get you moving, but gets you moving in the right direction.
What’s your biggest motivation challenge right now? Drop a comment and let’s figure it out together.
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