Hello everyone,
My most dire issue is me, and I am an alcoholic. I have a sobriety date of January 2, 2022, and a Sponsor who knows she is my Sponsor. She has a Sponsor too. My Sponsor has taken me through the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. These days, I have the opportunity, and immense honor, to Sponsor other women as well.
As for the spiritual awakening that comes from these 12 steps, I will honestly “tell on myself” and say that I ask my higher power, whom I have decided to call God, all on my own—no one has ever told me to say that—”When is it going to happen?” It has. I also ask for my spiritual experience. That has happened daily since I picked up that first white chip.
I think I will begin by saying that my alcoholic career began at a very young age. I would swear it is possible for a switch to go off once alcohol touches your lips that first time. I am unsure of that, but I can say that by the age of 8, I was off to the races, sneaking sangria every night before bedtime because it helped me sleep! Plus, I loved how sweet it was. I didn’t taste the alcohol. That was the last thing on my mind. Well, of course at 8 I may not be very picky as to whether or not something would get me tispy, but the feelings of strange, and unable to understand things, and something just not tasting good were normal. Well, alcohol did not fit the bill hidden behind the fruity sangria I would have on a nightly basis. Of course, I was extremely smart and would just add water to the bottle. Of course (smiling), my mother never noticed, nor did she taste it either. Of course, right? Those are the lies I told myself all the way to the age of 37, when I completely decided that alcohol would never come near me again.
I did this on my own. I didn’t see the possibility of a program like AA or that I needed it. Now I look back and realize how miserable I was all of these years and the years before 37. What exactly was I thinking? I am not sure. Looking back, I can see how much alcohol controlled my life and hindered my ability to live fully. Finally, seeking help through Alcoholics Anonymous has been life-changing. I am grateful for the support of my Sponsor and the opportunity to help other women on their journeys to sobriety. I hope that by sharing my experiences, I can inspire others to seek the help they need and begin their own path to recovery.
The road is long but sweet if you allow it to be.
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